No Rush

June 29, 2009 · Posted in gratitude, holidays 

The weekend was fun. I really love having the kids. I’m kind of surprised as I never expected what fun it would be to have little kids back in my life. I thought I was happy to have a child free life. Maybe I was just trying to convince myself of that because I thought it was my reality. We go to the park, play games, watch kids movies and the conversations are simple and sweet. There’s lots of laughing and silliness and I feel very blessed to be included this young family. Darin is a great dad and I enjoy watching him with them also. It’s a refreshing thing to have these fortnightly guests. All other concerns get pushed aside to be in the moment with three excited individuals. I feel sad when they go home, so I’m feeling a lot more empathy for my ex and his partner because now I’m on the other side of the fence. I agree it is the easier side in terms of daily care and responsibility, yet there’s still a price to pay.

This morning I woke up early. I just can’t sleep in and waste my precious leisure time. I will have afternoon naps if I feel tired, they are more indulgent to me. I read my emails and feeds. I really read them, not skimming quickly for important stuff, read and comprehended. I feel the released from the rush of my everyday life. When Darin left for work I exercised and it felt great to have the time to do that. I love exercising, but not enough to squeeze it in when I’m tired and stressed….silly me.  Everything is chosen and deliberate and it feels amazing. I have no definate plans yet many possibilities and it’s the way I love my life to be.

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Comments

One Response to “No Rush”

  1. Sarah (1 comments.) on July 2nd, 2009 12:07 pm

    Wow! That sounds like a pretty cool place to be in your life. I will get there one day, i promise you. :-D

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