I have spent the evening with one of my close friends who lost her brother this week. A student from one of our schools (Marist) died this week. There were many students this week feeling it. Another close friend lost a brother in law. I don’t personally know any of these people but I have met some of them. Their loss doesn’t hurt me except through seeing my friends suffer.
When we lose someone we love, it is an incredible opportunity for the survivors to share how they feel about that person and about each other. That is what I have witnessed. I have never forgotten when my grandfather died some August’s ago the love that I felt from my year 9 class and my friends. I really appreciated their support and kindness. Those students are now my year 12′s. I remember their goodness.
I had a year 10 student today asking my advise about what kind of message he should leave on his friend’s facebook page. Our students are not meant to access facebook in class, but sometimes there are more important things than the school rules. In a very respectful tone, I asked him who he thought would read that message on facebook and how they would feel about what he wrote. He was no longer communicating to her, it was her loved ones that he needed to consider, when he left his final note. That is the most important literacy to me. The literacy of the heart in the times of the greatest vulnerability.
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Hi – I just landed here from Rhubarb’s blog to find a topic for which I (sadly) have advice…
Speaking for myself, I found that a simple “I’m sorry” is good. Share stories of the person and how much they meant to you.
One of the best things for me has been daily e-mails from my best friend.
…and that grief is a long-term thing. Writing weekly or monthly is good.
Thanks for dropping by Amanda and sharing from your experience. I agree, it’s long term. Your best friend sounds like a keeper:-)