Tag Archive for self-esteem

The Library & Rock Eisteddfod

Today I got to work in the library for a period! I loved it. Having conversations with young people about books they are reading is my idea of fun. Putting books away and exploring all the new young adult titles in a different library is bliss. I got to borrow some too! I have a Scot Westerfield novel, yes only one because I have been limiting my piles lately. I can only read a couple of books at a time:).

The Professional Development shelf tempted me to take two. Will Richardson’s book, Blogs, Wikis, Podcasts, and Other Powerful Web Tools for Classrooms, which I have just had a quick flick through, looks great. It’s interestesting because Will has just stopped blogging and is now tumbling. I follow his tumblr and he continues to have great insights and information about using technology in education. The other is a book by Matthew Williams, Making Real-Life Videos, which is another thing I love doing with students and there are some great ideas in it.

“Matthew Williams is Lecturer in Criminology and Criminal Justice in the School of Social Science, Cardiff University. He is currently on the board of directors for the Association of Internet Researchers (AoIR) and has been involved with the development of ethical guidelines for conducting research online.” Reader Store

It looks great. I also like making clips for my family so I hope that will enhance those skills too!

In my last lesson we got to preview the school’s Rock Eisteddfod entry. It was a colourful and energetic display of what students can do when given the opportunity. I love to see students perform, great for their self esteem.

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Girlo’s Check this out

One of my favourite authors for young women attempting to navigate their way in the world is Anthea Paul. Her Girlosophy books are a great read and I’ve never given one to a young woman at school without having her rave about how much it made her feel better about herself. That is surely all that needs to be said to recommend them to you.

There is a new Girlosophy website! There are some great links and articles on there as well as groups. I can’t rate her and the work she does highly enough.

I think girls of all age deserve to indulge themselves in Anthea Paul’s philosophy on living on your own terms.

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Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling by Dr Wayne Dyer

I’ve enjoyed a few books by Dr Wayne Dyer over the years. I think the first one was ‘You’ll See it When You Believe It’ or something like that. When I read about the ‘law of attraction’ or ‘The Secret’ it seems same idea and there are probably plenty of other versions of it.  The first ever new agey type book I read ‘Creative Visualisation’ by Shakti Gawain, is similar. I don’t often reread these books, but I can enjoy the same messages in different voices.

This book is a mixture of anecdotes, practical steps and quotes. It reinforced the message from the previous book I’d read ‘The Art of Trust’. It’s about finding what you can give that makes you feel good and trusting what you know. I like to read books that acknowledge spirit. If I don’t remind myself of that part of life, I lose the magic.

I felt very uninspired about my work life before I took my holidays. I was considering looking for a new job or different work. I felt like my time was up at my school and I was ready to move on. I just couldn’t settle on what next. I think having six weeks to choose exactly what I wanted to do, and mostly the things I did were pretty self indulgent, left me realising it would never be enough to just entertain and amuse myself. I need to interact with others and learn with them and solve problems. It keeps everything in the right balance for me.

It’s inspired me to get a bit more pushy about the things I believe in work wise. I have some strong ideas about what it is to be a teacher today. They are not always popular and I don’t have stats, facts and figures to back what I believe, so I want to get some. I don’t want to be an academic. I don’t want to do any more university study, but I do want to express what I believe and I will on this blog as well as continuing to be vocal and outspoken at school. I had started to believe that I couldn’t change anything so why bother. It was a very frustrating and dull way to be because I still felt the same and by not expressing it because I’d given up, I was losing self respect. It really doesn’t matter if things change the way I hope, I want to take action in support of what I know to be true.

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Our Little Secret by Allayne Webster

‘Our Little Secret’ is very popular with the girls at school. Now that I have completed it, I can see why.  It’s set in a small community and unpretentiously reveals some of the hardships teen girls grapple with. The position the young, innocent heroine finds herself in is described with a clear youthful voice. It was very believable and I’m confident this book would be a great aid to young women who find themselves manipulated and abused in this way. I would even go so far as to say it could protect and help to heal some of the damage done to girls who find their sexual behaviour going too far too fast.  It reveals the insecurities and vulnerabilities with a gentle and considered approach. I recommend it for young women.

 Read a review on Inside a Dog. The writer Allayne Webster’s story is an interesting read also.

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Use the Force

star-wars-confidence-motivational-han-solo-princess-liea.jpg

I love Star Wars. A while back one of my favourite astrologers Mystic Medusa alerted me to www.icanhasforce.com in this post about Retro Mercury. I enjoyed the picture and found one today to inspire me.

I continually have to work on my self-esteem, damn it all. Why can’t you just get it handled and have it stay handled! If anyone knows how to do that… feel free to give me your secret in the comments.  

Popularity: 11% [?]

Tom Woods Shares His Experience of Cyberbullying

“When I was cyber-bullied, first and foremostly, I felt violated, humiliated, anxious and upset. I wanted to hit the person back immediately.”

Tom Woods is a 16 year old boy who you may have heard of before. ‘Student cracks Government’s $84m p0rn filter’ (Herald Sun) was the first I’d heard of him. His latest feat ‘Schoolboy whiz helps draft Labor cyber policy’ (Sydney Morning Herald) is more constructive. I am delighted to introduce him as a guest blogger, sharing his experience of cyberbullying. This is an issue I feel strongly about having watched students suffer, for long periods in silence with this torment. I agree with Tom and feel we must raise awareness of this issue.

Tom Woods:

“Just to get everyone up-to-scratch, when I was 14, I went through months of harassment and threats online – not from kids at school like most cases, but people on forums, discussion websites, about topics I was interested in.

As it was a forum involving technology, many members were very literate, many knew how to exploit vulnerabilities, hack into websites, forum accounts, companies, and all the rest.

These sorts of people are more like to be risk-takers, non-conformists and aggressive types – they would just flame (bag and swear at people on forums for no legitimate reasons) – the anonymity acting as, I guess, a sort of a ‘cloak’ – an invincibility jacket – they feel like they can do whatever they wanted. One day one guy hacked into my forum account, I retaliated, which was soon to be seen by me as the start of a horrible chain of events of threats, harassment, and more hacking attempts.

The horrible thing was I wasn’t used to being harassed in real-life – and everything would immediately make my stomach sink, a sick feeling would embed in my psyche. I didn’t know what to do – I wanted to retaliate, but there was no effective way. I always saw myself in the right. My parents wouldn’t have had any idea about it – it would’ve made them worried, possibly want to disconnect me from the computer, a notion that I thought would only complicate and make the situation worse. The lawless nature of the internet creating an environment of harassment with no feasible way out.

I didn’t really tell anyone – and any friends I did suggest it to would shrug it off, as I would do in a public arena.

The greater audience some forms of Internet harassment brings, just compounded the situation – the thought the whole forum community made me feel completely violated and humiliated.

Eventually I just didn’t bother responding. I left the forum, deleted everything I could, reported everything I could and after that it just went away.

So I wanted to make a difference – educating kids now, as my website does, the most pertinent personal point being to not respond.

But my case was rare – most cases are from peers – kids known in real-life. It continues 24/7, no matter where they are, they will be hurt, the audience can indeed make them feel violated, and the ability for the abuse to be read or watched again and again just amplifies the impact. It’s normal bullying times 3. But there are things you can do to help prevent it, and certain steps you can take to resolve it if it occurs. The problem is not the bullying, but the lack of knowledge, and collaborative programs offering policies and effective, relevant education is vital – for schools and all. My guide for cyber-bullying is here – http://thewoodverdict.blogspot.com/2008/04/tom-woods-complete-guide-to-stopping.html – which contains what I think is a complete advice package for parents, kids and the community alike. Governments and schools now need to work on delivering things like the contents of my guide to kids and all associated – because this great challenge can and must be overcome.”

I’m sure you’ll all agree with me that Tom is making a difference by becoming involved in the solution. I appreciate him sharing this experience.

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Exercise and Me

I like being fit. I really only like it because it allows me to do what I want to do. I haven’t always loved exercising and I’m not really a sporty person, but that could be due to commitment phobia, because I’ve played netball, tennis, basketball and enjoyed them all, but found being committed to a team to be a pain. I really like playing sport for fun and my competitive nature is reserved for other areas of my life (in other words I lack skill).

Since around July last year, I have lost 15 kgs. I can’t say it has been due to one special thing, but more a variety of influences including a great head start when I was sick with gastro a couple of times last year (not recommended- painful and upsetting). I have exercised, been busy, set a strong intention to lose weight and done a fair bit of personal growth in that period. I would say it is this combination of factors that really resulted in this loss.

When I was sick, I went to the doctors and she told me I really needed to lose 20kgs. 20 kgs. It seemed such a lot. I really hadn’t weighed myself for a long time and had decided that as long as I generally focussed on eating healthy and exercising regularly all should be well. Except I wasn’t really doing that. I was exercising randomly, comfort eating frequently, as well as eating generally well. So I dragged out the scales and began noticing what I wanted to deny. It’s so easy to not notice how big you are becoming!

I still have 5 to go and I haven’t shifted the scales a bit for around a month, but I am now enjoying a routine of exercising, drinking water, taking vitamins and eating regularly, mostly healthy foods. I honestly haven’t denied myself chocolate or lemon tart or any yummy things that come my way in the course of life. I just don’t make a habit of having every flavour delight I know in bulk quantities in easy access at home. I am about to start doing some different exercise cause I think the beep test showed me I’m still not really that fit. This site ExRx.net is a great resource for working out something that suits you. I also find Craig Harper quite motivating at times, for the mental side of it. I’m actually really enjoying my exercise now and I think that happens once you get over that hump at the beginning. You have more energy and so are more inclined to do more physically. It’s a half hour a day I get to listen to my iPod and feels like it’s something for me.

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Cyberbullying with Michael Carr-Greg

Tonight I drove a for a little over an hour to spend around an hour listening to Michael Carr-Gregg’s take on Cyberbullying. There was nothing really new there for me but he did mention a few interesting resources at the end of his talk that I will follow up.

He mentioned a new novel ‘Destroying Avalon’ by Kate McCaffrey, which sounds like a must read for me. Kate McCaffrey’s blog: Musings from the West has also been added to my feed as she sounds like an interesting author.

He spoke about his source of information Tommy Wood, the young man who made news by hacking an internet filter the government had spent a lot (vague I know, but too tired to check facts right now!) of money on. Wood Verdict is Tommy’s blog and if you aren’t surrounded by young people everyday to keep the reality of teen onlife life real for you, it may pay you to take a look at it.  Actually his most recent post just about covers all the information I’ve ever heard about dealing with Cyberbullying, so if you need to get up to speed on this topic read it.

I don’t want to sound cynical or jaded, but I was hoping for more. I want to go to a speaker with a bigger agenda for change than just informing the ‘grown ups’ about what’s going on. I want to hear someone address the real life circumstances and consequences for the people involved. On each occassion that I have had this issue come up with youth, I feel a bit left out in the cold and without guidance. I want a discussion about schools and parents engaging with their young people online. I want to hear more about those who successfully channel the new tools in schools to a more purposeful and constructive result. Here endeth the rant. Maybe another day, when it’s not so late, I too can be more constructive.

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Made My Day

You don’t have a clue how your words may help someone. Yesterday I read something on a blog, that I can’t explain because that would mean admitting to silly things I’d rather not admit to in public, and it made my day. To be more accurate it transformed my thinking around an area of my past that was a little sensitive (in case you hadn’t noticed). I am fairly confident the person who wrote it had no idea what she was doing, and if she did, more power to her – thanks. I would love to think I could make someones day like that, randomly and inadvertently.

It reminds me of that way of thinking that you never really know your true purpose because it is at a 90 degree angle to what you think you are doing that’s important. I’ve was on the receiving end of that yesterday, twice! 

Last night I went to a drive through fast food place. Two of the young people who served me, one taking my money and one giving me my food, were past students. They gave me the warmest greetings I’ve ever had in such a place. They were happy to see me!

One of them actually thanked me for recommending “Girlosophy” by Anthea Paul to her. She said it has really helped in so many ways, I’d never know, as she delivered my son’s meal to me.

It was an amazing feeling as I drove away. It’s the kind of informal feedback that really hits the spot! Sometimes, it’s great to work and live in the same community.

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“My Girlosophy” by Anthea Paul

Anthea’s book, ‘My Girlosophy’ would make the perfect gift for a young woman. I have ordered a copy for myself, even though I’m an old girl. This book is about one of my favourite things, journaling. It includes examples of Anthea’s journal and other ‘real life’ girl-you can read all about the many treasures in the review.

At school, in English we have had students journaling for the past couple of years and most of them enjoy it. Many students have been able to express things in their journal, they would find it difficult to talk about. It improves relationships between teachers and students. It improves their writing. We emphasise to students, that we are going to read them, so they need to be aware of their audience. I’ve seen some gorgeous journals created by young people. Just like blogging really!

“I write entirely to find out what I’m thinking, what I’m looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear.”
Joan Didion

In the film, ‘Freedom Writers’, the teacher used journals to give voice to her students very effectively. I think it is the most accessible personal growth tool available. Reflecting on your life, feelings and thoughts and then writing them down can order your thinking and help you to see yourself in a new way.

“How do I know what I think until I see what I say?”
E. M. Forster

I believe it is a very powerful medium and apart from my public journal – this blog, I keep a personal journal for my mental health. I write every random thought in it and have been doing this since 1988. I kept diaries when I was a young girl as well, yet destroyed them later as I felt they were too incriminating and didn’t want anyone to read them. I regret that now.

I have ordered a copy for the school library as well!

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